Real-life thorns of a pro-life family
How in the world does an active family of eight, with children from teen to toddler, actually practice stillness?
You shift your thinking. Make it as much of a priority in your family as scheduling band camp and soccer tournaments, piano lessons, and ACT prep courses. Almost every saint heard God in the quiet, not on the loudspeaker at a cheer competition. Participating in extracurriculars or volunteering in your community are all good and often holy endeavors as our children learn important skills such as teamwork, time management, goal setting, problem solving, and conflict resolution. But if we desire peace and purpose, we must make room for God’s love. How can He shine His light in if we insist He fit into our packed schedules?
Everything does have a cost; you just have to decide what currency you’re going to use and how high a price you are willing to pay
Newsflash: living a life with purpose and intention will not be popular. Friends may beg you to join the crazy fray once again, or they will sigh and wistfully share that they wish they could live your carefree life, but they are just too busy. Don’t get sucked into the lie, y’all. If you are a slave to your life, it’s because you choose to be.
Leave it to St. Francis de Sales, a 16th-century saint, to have advice applicable five centuries later:
Don’t sow your desires in someone else’s garden; just cultivate your own as best you can; don’t long to be other than what you are, but desire to be thoroughly what you are. Direct your thoughts to being very good at that and to bearing the crosses, little or great, that you will find there. Believe me, this is the most important and least understood point to the spiritual life. We all love according to what is our taste; few people like what is according to their duty or to God’s liking. What is the use of building castles in Spain when we have to live in France?
Or, as we say in Texas, don’t hang your wash on someone else’s line.
Our family learned from our mistakes of overdoing life. We learned that the view from the land of busy isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Yes, every once in a while we’re tempted to jump back in that lane for a fleeting second. Then we pause, look heavenward, and do a family check. Is this serving God, or it is serving our egos? Are we doing this in the name of “preparing our kids for college applications,” or are our motives honest and true?
Excerpt used with permission from Live Big, Love Bigger: Getting Real with BBQ, Sweet Tea, and a Whole Lotta Jesus, by Kathryn Whitaker (Ave Maria Press, 2019). From chapter entitled “And other lies we tell ourselves,” pp. 119-121. www.avemariapress.com
KATHRYN WHITAKER is a Legate in the Austin Chapter, Catholic author, blogger, speaker, and freelance graphic designer. A sixth-generation Texan, she was raised an evangelical Protestant, converting to Catholicism on the eve of her wedding. She has appeared in USA Today, Iowa Catholic Radio, The Son Rise Morning Show, Relevant Radio, and is a regular guest on The Jennifer Fulwiler Showon SiriusXM. Kathryn and her husband, Scott, live with their family in Austin, Texas. teamwhitaker.org