When things were black and white

Colleen Hammond says dressing more feminine brings out a man’s God-given virtues . .

Colleen Hammond

One beautiful dress after another strolled across the silver screen — and the women wearing them were elegant, self-assured and regal. Oh, how I love old black and white movies! As “The End” scrolled up the screen, my daughter sighed and asked, “Why don’t women dress like that anymore?”

Why indeed! Why don’t men hold doors open for women? Why are teens targeted with “paranormal” romance novels and movies? And why is life not respected from conception to natural death?

Our culture has fallen into irreverence and, like frogs in boiling water, we’ve become desensitized to it all … or have we? Isn’t it nice to see men who still have a sense of chivalry? I’ve found that when I’m dressed in a neat, modest and feminine manner, men will hold doors for me, help me find things at the hardware store, and offer to put my carry-on luggage in the overhead compartment. I’m not trying to manipulate men, but dressing more feminine certainly brings out a man’s God-given virtues.

My male friends also tell me that it’s much more enjoyable to speak with women who are dressed tastefully because they’re not distracted by her body. A woman who dresses with dignity appeals to their chivalrous nature. On the other hand, if a woman is dressed in an unfeminine manner, men are more likely to treat her like “one of the guys.” Worse yet, if she’s dressed immodestly they may view her as a sexual object — and they certainly won’t treat her with respect.

Human nature doesn’t change. Yet modesty is instinctive. Have you ever tried to bathe a child approaching the age of reason? But this instinct can be lost if it’s violated enough. Pope Pius XII wrote, “O Christian mothers, if you only knew what shame you lay up for your sons and daughters by imprudently accustoming them to live barely attired, making them lose the natural sense of modesty. Take fright at the shame you inflict upon yourselves and the harm which you occasion to your children, entrusted to you by Heaven to be brought up in a Christian manner.” Ouch.

It’s not about what works for you or what doesn’t — it’s about what’s right and what’s wrong. There are absolutes. Truth “works” for everyone. “Hooker-chic” is just plain wrong. Trashy isn’t true. Is dressing modestly about virtue, morality, and not being an occasion of sin for our brother? Or is it about “fitting in” and “being cool”? Following the fashions so that you don’t draw undue attention to yourself is absolutely fine. It’s humble, in fact. Conversely, wearing things that will draw undue attention to yourself — either frumpy or flashy — shows a lack of humility.

“The trend of fashions is not in itself evil,” Pius XII wrote. “It flows spontaneously from the social nature of man, in accordance with an impulse which inclines him to keep in harmony with his fellow men, and with the way of acting of those amongst whom he lives. God does not ask you to live outside your times, so careless of the exigencies of fashion as to render yourselves ridiculous, by dressing in a way opposed to the common tastes and practices of your contemporaries.

“In following fashion, virtue lies in the middle course,” he continued. “What God asks of you is to remember always that fashion is not, and cannot be, the ultimate rule of conduct for you, that beyond fashion and its demands, there are higher and more pressing laws, principles superior to fashion, and unchangeable, which under no circumstances can be sacrificed to the whim of pleasure or fancy, and before which must bow the fleeting omnipotence of the idol of fashion.”

What strategies can we follow that will allow us to be virtuous and fashionable at the same time? “A dress cannot be called decent which is cut deeper than two fingers breadth under the pit of the throat, which does not cover the arms at least to the elbows, and scarcely reaches a bit beyond the knees. Furthermore, dresses of transparent material are improper.” These guidelines were developed and released by mandate of Pope Pius XI.

Until Rome changes them or says otherwise, those are the guidelines. Pius XII said, “To say that ‘modesty is a matter of custom’ is just as wrong as to say that ‘honesty is a matter of custom.’” There are absolutes. And the Church has continued to talk about modesty since then and has never once abrogated those guidelines.

When the morality of women declines, the entire culture implodes around it — so it’s essential that women embrace their God-given feminine role. We can get back to the elegance and dignity of the old black and white movies, but only if we as families are willing to take action now.

Colleen Hammond is a blogger, former Weather Channel meteorologist, model, actress and Miss Michigan National Teen-Ager. She is the author of “Dressing with Dignity.” Her next book, “The Gossip’s Guide,” will be released this fall.