Changing hats between office and home

February 1, 2021

Whether husband and wife are equal partners at work, they certainly must be at home,
according to Meg Cadoux Hirshberg, author of For Better or for Work: A Survival Guide for
Entrepreneurs and Their Families. For some, the juxtaposition of roles can be challenging. Here are just a few insights to good relationships based on gleanings from her book.

Regardless of job titles, your spouse is your number-one consultant. Your spouse is not
just another employee or executive. You are collaborators pursuing a common goal in both
business and life. Even a stay-at-home spouse deserves to be respected and consulted on
business and workplace matters.

Set gray-line boundaries between work and home. It’s probably unrealistic to “not talk about
work at home.” But when you do, avoid elevating stress through unproductive gripe sessions
or rehashing mistakes. Focus on recapping the day’s highs and lows, noting new ideas that are
energizing, and seeking solutions to business concerns. Then quickly get back to family life. You
might even agree on some kind of signal to put an end to the workday and the start of family
time — changing into casual wear, putting away the smartphone, or family prayer before dinner.

Remember, your marriage is on display. Accurately or not, your relationship with your spouse at work will reflect on your relationship at home. If you interact in an “all-business” manner or there is palpable tension between you, even involving work-related issue, other workers might assume there are tensions at home. Maintaining a healthy, warm, respectful business marriage is a better witness for a good marriage itself.

Conduct a regular relationship review. Every six months or so, re-evaluate how your work life is affecting your home and marriage. Make necessary adjustments.