From storms to flowers - what the COVID-tempest left in its wake

Earlier in the month, Gress ventured from her home in Virginia with her husband and five children, ages 15 months to 12, to visit friends in California and speak at the San Juan, California Legatus Chapter meeting.
In this Legatus magazine interview, Gress acknowledged that living through the pandemic this past year brought challenges, but also many blessings to carry into the future. “Homes were becoming more like hotels; places we would sleep and go on our way,” she said. “But since we’ve been stuck in our homes, the pandemic has been restoring the significance of home.”
Gress defines home as “a place where families gather to ultimately bring each other to heaven. It is the place where we love each other and try to order our nature such that grace can build on it in beautiful ways.
Home is meant to be a kind of sanctuary where we are sanctified,” she said. “It’s where we find transcendental moments like in church and heaven—things like light, nourishment, forgiveness, safety, and comfort.”

BLESSINGS FROM COVID

By spending so much time at home this past year, Gress explained that we began to see it in a new light. “The importance of home as a sanctuary and a place of tenderness where you are cared for has been heightened.” A sign of that, according to her, is that home and building stores have flourished as people invest in the beauty and comfort of their homes.
There is also the nurturing of our family relationships. Gress, who homeschools their children, said it’s not for everyone, but she keeps hearing from women who have enjoyed having their children school at home and from career women who have been pleasantly surprised at how much they have enjoyed spending more time with their children.

Home as our base harkens back to the pre-industrial, agrarian age where it was the center of life, according to Gress. “The fundamental elements of a home is for both family life and for the makeup of civilization,” she said. “Historically, they can be a cave or dirt floors. We have obviously transcended that significantly with the advent of running water and electricity, but fundamentally, it’s still the same place: a shelter and a place with a hearth to warm us and to cook our food to allow us to live on a biological level, but then the spiritual can also flourish in us.”

Gress’s first book, Theology of Home: Finding the Eternal in the Everyday, was published in September 2019 and Theology of Home II: The Spiritual Art of Homemaking was released last October. In between the book releases, on February 13, 2020 she gave birth to her fifth baby, just a few weeks before turning 47. “I went on Fox News talking about one of my books and had said I did not mind being barefoot and pregnant. The next thing I knew, I was pregnant after five years of thinking I could not have any more children,” she said. “It was wonderful.” It turned out to be a great time to have a baby, she said, since her husband would be working from home for several months and was a big help.

HOME HAS HOSPITALITY

Theology of Home II offers inspiration from women on the love of homemaking and serving. In the 1950s that was a given, but by the ‘70s and ‘80s there was a cultural aversion to homemaking that is being redeemed. Gress pointed to the popularity of the Food Network and HGTV and the celebrity status of Joanna Gaines. “Sewing, knitting, embroidery, and calligraphy… all of these things are back in,” she said.

An important part of homemaking hindered during COVID but starting up anew, Gress explained, is hospitality. “A vital part of evangelization is loving people and being open to them,” she said. “We can see this on the parish level, too. Among some of the COVID season’s damaging elements have been restrictions on reaching out to people, especially the elderly who have often been isolated.”

While staying with friends in California, Gress said it was fun to experience some of the new recipes the husband practiced during COVID. “People are using their new skill sets as things open up again. Ultimately, every gift we’ve been given is meant to be shared. That’s why it’s such a delight to be able to host others.”

One of Gress’s neighbors learned to bake sourdough bread during COVID. “She can’t eat it all, so she shares it with neighbors and people love her for it.”

SPIRITUAL GROWTH

There has also been the experience of going deeper in faith for many this past year. “I keep hearing stories of people being transformed through all this,” Gress said. “People have realized the fragility of life—how quickly things can change. Many started taking note of the details of life, opening up a sense of wonder. We hear about people doing things like gardening for first time.”

Gress reflected that the spiritual growth we’ve gained needs to be nurtured and an inner calm cultivated. “That is not going to be something that the world gives us,” she said. “We already knew that, but this has been a much-needed reminder. This is an opportunity to go deeper and make sure the peace and calm we have is coming from Christ, because we can have a false sense of security based on what is around us. It’s easy to think that the world is going to be okay, but we know it’s going to be okay because of who Christ is. We know that He ultimately wins. He renews everything.”

Gress acknowledged that stress can be hard to avoid, but that is where faith comes in. “Padre Pio made it easy: ‘Pray, trust, and don’t worry,’ he always said.

“It’s easy to say but very hard to live,” says Gress. “That is what Christ offers us through our faith. Even in those scenarios in the emergency room—we are always called to surrender to His will.”

Gress suggested building joy and delight into our lives. “Even something as simple as making coffee—for me it’s espresso— without overdoing it,” she said. “This is not unconnected from the constant surrender to God, while also checking in with His grace—whether it’s through the Eucharist, the rosary, Adoration, or Confession—to help keep that balance. The whole picture has to be working together for us to be healthy, and to trust what God is doing in our lives.” 

PATTI ARMSTRONG is a Legatus magazine contributing writer.